There’s no ivorceoubt about it, divorce is tough. Whether you have chosen to separate or not, it’s going to be one of the most challenging times of your life. Although there may be no way to make the emotional fallout any easier, there are practical steps you can take to find the most painless route through the process. From working out how to file for divorce to planning your next steps after filing, here are some tips.
Seek legal advice
Seek legal as soon as you can. An experienced divorce lawyer will be able to guide you through the divorce process and explain the steps that need to be taken. This will include the divorce itself as well as identifying your assets and working out the best financial settlement with your partner.
You might feel that you want to get the divorce over with as quickly as possible, but it’s really important to properly consider the financial side of the situation and only make agreements that you are completely happy with. This is especially important if there are children involved. A lawyer will be able to offer objective, rational and professional advice and guard against decisions that you might later regret.
Try mediation
There are two ways you can go when it comes to a divorce- mediation or litigation. Mediation is by far the most painless process as it is about reaching an agreement with your ex-partner without having to resort to a lengthy legal battle.
Mediation is also cheaper as it involves lower fees. If you can maintain a civilized relationship with your ex-partner then this will also be much easier for children in the long run. Litigation and continued animosity between the two of you will make the whole process much more difficult for your kids.
Take things one day at a time
It’s easy to get bogged down in the long term implications of the divorce and become anxious or depressed about the future. Worrying about the long term is not going to do you any favours at this stage, when you really need to be pragmatic and focus on finding a solution to the short term issues such as where you are going to live, looking after the kids (if you have any), and sorting out finances. If you are finding it particularly difficult to navigate your way through this then consider seeing a councillor. Having an impartial and sympathetic ear during this time can be a huge help.
Although there may be no easy way through a divorce things can be made easier by seeking good legal advice and mediation over litigation. Have you recently gone through a divorce? What advice would you give to others who are at the beginning of the process?